One of the hardest things I have had to deal with since becoming a mom is the fact that you can't plan anything. Two reasons- babies don't understand the concept of time, and even if you do get out the door on time, something is bound to screw up your plans. Perfect example from this weekend actually...I had a meeting with a fellow blogger on Saturday morning, and had made plans to go to my parents house for the afternoon. Texted my mom and said I would be there around 12 or 12:30. My meeting got done right as I expected it to at 11:30, so I start getting the diaper bag, car seat, my purse, everything, ready to go. I get the diaper bag and my purse over my shoulder, get Jennie in her car seat on my arm, and get out the door into the garage. Crap! I just realized I have to pee. Then I get to thinking as I head back inside, that I hadn't peed since the night before. So I put my purse, the diaper bag and Jennie down and run to the bathroom. Do my business. Get all loaded up again, going through the garage, throw Jennie up into the truck. As I buckle the car seat in, I smell something. Crap! Literally...Jennie pooped. Back inside...and of course it would be the kind of poop that I have to change her whole outfit because both her shirt and pants were ruined. A new outfit and 12 wipes later, I load her and her stuff up again. Back in the truck, and at this point I realize I should probably check what time it is. It's 12:45. And it doesn't matter that all I was doing was going to my parents- I hate being late. But that's another thing you get over when you have a baby. You're either late to everything, or super early because you allotted way too much time to get ready.
Another thing you realize when you become a parent is that it's never just one thing that goes wrong. It's a domino effect, which eventually leads into Murphy's Law. And I take everything personally so anything that does go wrong makes me think it's all my fault and I start kicking myself. You can do better than that...you should have done this instead of that...how could you let this happen? It all runs through my head. Can't help it, but usually after it's all said and done, it's never as bad as I think it was. I have been feeling kind of down on myself for the past few days. Then Jake showed me a picture our friend, and my fellow co-worker, took of Jennie today, and it hit me- if I am such a bad mom, how come my daughter looks so happy here? Thanks Amber...it's the little things :)