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Monday, August 20, 2012

When are you ready?

I'm blogging before 10pm...this feels strange. Jennie decided that she only wanted to take one nap today, so she has been out for almost 40 minutes already. I'm hoping she is down for the night, not just taking an extended nap. Waking up at 2am is not my favorite thing to do anymore. Hell, it never was to begin with.

Speaking of 2am wake up calls, I think Jake is missing them. Guess who decided to pop the "are we ready for baby #2?" question on me a while back? Yea, that's right. NOT ME. Jake. Seriously, our relationship roles are so reversed, and apparently daddy has the itch. I knew it would happen sooner or later since he has been having a hard time dealing with fact that he will be a father to a one year old next month. Like, every time I bring up the fact that we need to start planning her birthday party, he changes the subject. But his question has got me thinking about what it's like to have 2 kids. Or 3, or 9, like I want. I'm having an inner battle with myself as we speak- I want a large family, but don't feel ready for our next baby yet. Jake jokes that he is going to get "the cut" after 2 kids, and I say he has to find me more baby-daddies then but how can I want a houseful of kids when I have a heart attack thinking about getting pregnant again? I had such an easy pregnancy with Jennie so that isn't the problem. Although I know alot of my friends who are pregnant right now are having a really hard time (yea Kim, your current pregnancy is scaring the crap outta me!) I guess everything that I'm afraid of is what EVERYONE is afraid with during all of their pregnancies. I think with your first pregnancy, the new-ness of the experience blocks out some of the negative thoughts.

Oh, guess what, Jennie is awake. And crabby. Looks like a long night ahead...

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