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Monday, September 10, 2012

My life is over

Can't believe I get to say this- my baby girl is walking. Not just walking, running actually. I have only been home from work about 3 hours and am exhausted from making sure she doesn't get into anything she isn't supposed to. Or making sure she doesn't try to plug in Jake's reclining chair. Yes, La-Z-Boy has reached a whole new level of laziness...Jake has a recliner that must be plugged in and has buttons to push to recline the chair. And Jennie has taken it upon herself to try to plug in his chair any chance she can. Or she puts the cord in her mouth. Either way, I'm about to throw the chair in the garbage seeing as how Jake never uses it and I'm sick of keeping Jennie away from it. Think he would notice if he came home from work one day and an entire piece of furniture was missing? Judging by the fact that he hasn't noticed all the t-shirts he is missing because no one dude needs well over 200 t-shirts. And he doesn't do laundry. Ever. Yes, Jake had that many when we moved in together nearly 4 years ago. Definitely doesn't have that many now...

But anyways, Jennie Jo is walking. She started the process last week- she would take a few steps here or there with assistance but was still pretty shaky. Fast forward to Saturday morning and I'm pretty sure she just made the decision of "Hey I got this". Because she did have it...ever since Saturday she has been ON THE MOVE. And judging by all the comments I have been getting, apparently my life is over. But wait, those same people told me that same thing when they found out I was pregnant. And those same people said the same thing when Jennie started crawling. And hey, my life did change. But it's definitely not over.

I have been having a really tough time the past few weeks, struggling with the stresses of daily life, the desire to have alone time, and the guilt of wanting alone time. I can honestly say that, other than a few minutes here or there, I haven't had ANY "me" time since July. And I'm the first to admit that I'm not one of those moms who is happy only being a mom. I have to work, I have to have date nights with Jake, and I have to have time to remind myself that yes, I am a person too. I have my own wants and needs. And it doesn't matter how many times people tell you can't feel guilty for leaving Jennie. I'm a mom. Guilt is my middle name now. Especially after the weekend I just had- between Jennie walking, Jennie teething (she is getting two teeth at the same time...ugh), arguments with Jake about certain home improvement projects, and other people in my life not realizing that I don't have time for their shit, I need for it to be Friday already. Jason Aldean & Luke Bryan in St. Louis with a friend of mine who hasn't left my side even after my life was supposed to be over? Yes please! And happy anniversary to you, Erika and's to many years of happiness, love, laughter!

Here's me and some of my favorite girls in the world. I was 2 weeks away from delivering Jennie Jo and looking like a feet were HUGE after all the dancing that night, and it was all worth it! :)

1 comment:

  1. Great honest post! I have a 4 month old and I am hearing the same things. The world is a completely different place once they start rolling over...crawling...walking...running... I am trying to enjoy my last few weeks of "non-rolling over baby" as much as possible.